I want to dream big but sometimes i know i just can't coz it seems impossible. i don't have the capacity to be a great person, im not a socially-gifted guy who can befriend anyone who meets on his way and im not that intelligent nor smart enough to decide on my own. im too independently dependent. i cant be on my own. im used to be spoon fed and im too lazy sometimes. i have dreams that i cant imagine. im scared to be very attached with those dreams coz i might fail and disappoint myself or others. im too pessimistic sometimes to dream big maybe because im used to live a simple life. contentment is a word that i don't really understand. can i be rich and successful but at the same time simple? what is a simple life? is it bad not to be simple? I have dreams way bigger than what people think i can be. i want but can i?

Last night i had this crazy dream. But this one is clear and i can remember some parts of it. Me, my family and friends are having this sort of trip in a town. We'll be staying in this house with an old looking facade with nice rooms. The facade is made of wood that looks like the wild wild west bars. As we approached the house, a man in the front door welcomed us. It was very eerie. He showed me a frame with a newspaper article in it. I saw a picture of the old house with many women wearing an old fashioned dress lying all over the house. Some were lying in the roof, some in the lobby and some inside the house. Accordingly, a mass murder happened years ago in that house and the bodies were left everywhere. The pictures in the frame were so disturbing i can't believe we'll be staying in this house for days.

Then, what i can remember is that we are sleeping in a room. The room has white walls and we were lying comfortably in the floor where the bed. The next day we are out on a trip. There was a pier a few meters away from our home. There were this boats that are made of wood waiting for us. We'll be riding this big boat. The pier has this building and there's a bridge from the second floor to the big boat. We are now in the boat and i was just looking around. Suddenly, i realized that i forgot to bring my bags. I asked them to wait for me. They said that i should hurry up because the boat will be leaving in a while. I rushed to the creepy house and got my packs alone. I ran and the boat was already moving. I jumped to the boat which almost left me behind. Then i looked at the pier and i saw that i there's no 2nd second floor bridge thingy that i should have used. I realized that i'm on the wrong boat! We are leaving fast and i can see the big boat from a distance. I am all alone and i don't know what to do...

There are more of this dream but this is the part that struck me most. I hate this dreams where i am lost. I don't know where the heck i am. The place is so quiet and im just moving forward without any idea what's goin to happen. I woke up and it's already noon time. My right hand hurts and i can feel this pain when i move my thumb. I feel so lost. Now, im in the office to continue my work. I'm doing this shirt designs for my cousin but i can't fully concentrate. I cant produce a good design and its already 2 hours! I'm just surfin the net, checking my facebook account, and i suddenly remembered my dream. I googled "dream interpretation" and looked for the meaning of being lost in a dream. Here is the result:

Lost

To dream that you are lost, suggests that you have lost your direction in life or that you have lost sight of your goals. You may be feeling worried and insecure about the path you are taking in life. Alternatively, you may be trying to adjust and get accustomed to a new situation in which the rules and conditions are ever changing.

I also searched some symbols in my dream like "dead," "house," "boat," "wall," and more. I realized that my dream is so right. I am kinda lost in my direction in life now. Yesterday was just stressful coz i have to face crossroads. I don't know what will be happening in the next few months. Yeah, i'm still in the adjustment period after finishing school. There are things that i want to do and there things that people want me to do. I'm not sure if my decisions are good coz some people might be affected. Anyways, everyday all have to face our challenges in life. I just hope that i will be enlightened so everything will be well...

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credits to ~buaiansayapanomali for the photo

I want to share my new experimental works that i created in flash during a seminar that we conducted last May12-15. With the use of the pen tool and pencil tools, i doodle different objects and scenes and applied the ukkil effect in the artwork. Ukkil is a technique used in Mindanao, specifically in the Sulu Peninsula. It is a decorative design that is used in carving, basketry, pottery, and weaving with patterns similar to the western style of Arabesque and Art Nouveau.

According to my Humanities teacher, during the Byzantine era, the Iconoclasts influenced the art of the Arabic countries spreading across Asia. Before, it was a sin for Muslims to recreate or paint/sculpt the creations of God such as human or animals. That's why they used geometric patterns, ornamental designs and icons. We can see this in the art of the Tausug, Maranao and Yakans here in Mindanao, which applies shapes and patterns similar to the art during the Byzantine era. Ukkil usually have motifs shaped like waves, ropes, calligraphy, decor and colors.

But today, that belief seems to be gone already. The yakans already has new designs that are influenced by their surroundings like the kenna-kenna, patterned after a fish; dawen-dawen (leaf of a vine) ; pene mata-mata, (eye) and the bunga-sawa (python). In Ukkil, they have motifs of creatures like the sarimanok, horse, insects, fishes, dragons, flowers and even humans.

I personally know one of Philippines best painter who uses the style of ukkil in his paintings and drawings. He is Mr Rameer Tawasil. Mr Tawasil was my teacher in oil painting one summer and he is also my student in photoshop that year. His art is very vivid and cultural. He mastered his ukkil style in painting and now he is known nationally for his style. Here are some essential links that you might want to visit:

Ukkil, Visual Arts of the Sulu Archipelago
Paintings of Rameer Tawasil
my Vector Ukkil Doodles

New stars were born! 2 months ago Lady Gaga's Telephone music video was released and now the youtube video reached almost 40 million hits. With its stunning visuals and unique style, this video is surely one the best music videos of the year. Along with its rising popularity, a young filipino Lady Gaga fan also gained the attention of the youtube viewer's. He is Vinzon Leojay Rubia Booc (vinzonleojay2009), famously known as Lady Gagita. Together with his friends, they created parodies of the music videos of Lady Gaga with nothing but their creativity and resourcefulness. Now, the youtube sensation reached national level with TV appearances, Newspaper features and photo shoots. With better costumes, make-up and studio, Lady Gagita and Haronce (his friend who played Beyonce in the Telephone video), were given an exclusive photo session. Here are the photos of Lady Gagita and Haronce.

Photos were published in Manila Bulletin last May 14, 2010. (photo1, photo2)
Photography: Niccolo Cosme
Styling: Matt Gozun
Makeup: Jake Galvez
Headpiece and Rubber Dress: Nixon Marquez and Chi Kotur

Disclaimer: I don't own the photos. I just got the link from Vinzon's facebook. :D
Click here for more photos.

I would like to share this beautiful video created by the GreenPeace organization to promote awareness on environmental protection. This is a conceptual video made of texts, icons and hands only. I love it because it's so creative and innovative. The message is very clear and it inspires us to do action in conserving nature. Here is the video.



Talking about nature, I was watching the National Graphic Channel last April 22 in observance of the Earth Day. They featured documentaries about the ever-changing earth especially the least undiscovered place in it, the underwater. Our knowledge about the underwater in merely a droplet in the ocean and we even know more about space and what's out there than what we have here in the seas. I watch "Shark Eden" and I learned that the underwater paradise are very rare nowadays. These Eden are well-balanced ecosystems with unbleached corals, bountiful sea creatures and Sharks, as to Lions in savannas. I want to share this advocacy of protecting the underwater edens also because of my experience which i shared in my doodle blog. I also created a simple artwork to commemorate the Earth day. Click the image below to read the article.

The BSIT students celebrated the first Ateneo New Media and Animation Festival last March 30, 2010 at the College AVR, ADZU. This is an event that showcases the projects of the BSIT sophomore, junior and senior students during the second semester. The best out of the entries were judged by a panel and the winners were given recognition on that day. The categories are Poster Design, Shirt Design, Music Video and Animated Music Video. Some minor awards were also given like Best Director, Best Cinematography, Best Story, Best Visual Effects, Best Choreography and more. This event was organized by the CS Department led by Mr Glenn Oliva and sponsored by MCTV and E-Designs.

I can't still move on about this end thing. My last post is basically about my college life. Here i would like to share my latest artwork which i created in commemoration of Earth Day. This is a typographic artwork which i created to remind people of the consequences of our actions today. Because of the things that we do to nature, we are slowly putting it to an end. It is our time to change our deeds and learn how to live green. We can do this by supporting Earth Hour, a worldwide event where people switches their lights off for an hour. It will happen on March 27, 8:30-9:30 PM (here in the Philippines GMT +8:00). Imagine how many kilowatts of energy will be saved if all the lights will switched off in an hour. Earth hour is a special time to save the earth. For more info, visit this website and learn how you can contribute to this special occasion.

Going back to my artworks, i created them one in illustrator and photoshop. The typography is a customized font that i made using the brush strokes and later added colors to create a more organic look. I can't make up my mind on what background to use so i created two versions. The first one is more light and dry while the second one is more intense. Click on the images for full view and credits.

I haven't been exercising my vexelling skills for a while so i decided to make this one. This photo has been in my hard drive for a long time since i discovered it. Its a gorgeous portrait of my favorite model, Katarzyna Dolinska of ANTM Cycle 10. I love this pic because it is so surreal and it is very high fashion. I really liked the hair and makeup in this one that's why i kept this in case i have the mood to vexel it. Since I already finished my projects (did i mention that i'll be graduating 2 weeks from now? weee), i. This is my 2nd vexel of her. Click here to view the first one. Here's the artwork:

Click here for full view :D

Click here to see Katarzyna's model profile.

I'm so happy that our short animation, Mayari, was included in the lineup of Cinema Rehiyon 2010. It is a national film festival showcasing the side of Philippine independent cinema that you've never seen before held at the CCP Tanghalang Manuel Conde (Dream Theater) last Feb 17-20, 2010. Cinema Rehiyon is a project of the National Commission for the Culture and the Arts, Crossing Negros Cultural Foundation, Inc. and the Cultural Center of the Philippines. To be shown during the film festival are over 70 short and full-length films, most of which are screening in Metro Manila for the first time. Stories about home, by people who live in them, spoken in their native tongue.

Our short film Mayari was included in the category "Crossing Borders." The story is based on a Pampangan myth about the epic duel of the gods of the heavens. Mayari became also a finalist during last year's Animahenasyon, an animation festival.

I hope that next year more films from Mindanao especially in Zamboanga in film festivals like this. We have all the talent and content but we need to expose these talents. Let us create more film so we can also tell the world our stories.

You can watch the film here: